Wednesday, August 19, 2015

A moment for ourselves: time to slow down

Take a moment for yourself today. Hit the pause button on life for a few ticks of the clock. Think of a word, an adjective. Think of a descriptive, calm word.

For me, that word is deep.

I only have a moment to steal for myself, so this word is a good one. 

Deep breaths in and out.

Deep thoughts.

Deep... in cool cotton sheets of my bed. That's where I want to be. 

The last few weeks have created an intense pressure inside of my brain. Rarely do I have a single  moment of peace. Days are seemingly endless chains of child care, toddler tantrums, snack prep, meal service, and mess clean-up, intermingled with fast email responses via my phone or sneaky segments of time at the computer while the little one watches "Melmo" (Elmo). Work has demands and family members have demands and my phone dings with messages all day; it's not very often than I acknowledge my own demands. Sometimes I feel deeply abused. 

Even nights are interrupted by a toddler who, in the midst of his own stressful transition to daycare, often cries out in his sleep from utter exhaustion. I am Mom, therefore I snap awake to his sounds. More often than not, he settles himself within seconds. Sometimes he needs a simple pat-on-the-back of reassurance that Mommy is still at home. The house is quickly silent again but, alas, my brain was switched on by his cry and cannot resettle. I am always deeply tired. 

I can picture myself deep in the comfort of my bed. Deep in the darkness of the night. Hopefully, deep within a colorful - yet restful - dream. Maybe one where I am deeply happy and deeply pampered. 

Work beckons and so do the kids, but I will remember this simple task. Taking a moment, even if it is simply 60 seconds, to just... stop. And breathe. And think. It can really help to surpass hurdles or break out of a rut. It can give me a little boost to keep on going. 

Sometimes life tries to run away with us. I have to get better at telling it no. 

Even if it's just for a minute.

What's your word today? 


4 comments :

  1. I hear you! And as a former child care provider and current child care center director, I want to let you know the transition will become a little easier. (your neighbor #4 at Mama Kat's)

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  2. Oh boy do I remember these days!! And I still have one child that at almost 6 years old, is a frequent night waker. And once I'm up.... I'm up for hours it seems. Deeply tired is a good description for moms! ha Honestly, my eldest is almost 11 and I do believe that's how long it's been since I slept through an entire night myself. But I am a firm believer in what you've beautifully said: breathe deep. Pause. try to just be in one moment at a time. I do think one day we will rest deep again! :)

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  3. I too hear you and have been through the disrupted sleep for the past 10+ years with 3 kids. Even though the youngest is now 5 but she and her brothers still disturb now and then when they have nightmares or wake up in the middle of the night to use the toilet.

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  4. You have described so many of my days. Slipping into bed is honestly the most luxurious part of my day.

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