Monday, May 7, 2012

Together, we are safe

We had a nasty storm here last night. Pounding hail, flashing lightning, and tremendously loud thunder made for a noisy evening. I was not home, out enjoying food, sangria, and fun conversation with some dear neighborhood friends. Other than the storm keeping us indoors (indicating the perfect time to say yes to dessert!), I did not think too much of it.

Apparently my daughter was not quite as unfazed. This morning, she popped out of bed and hugged me with more enthusiasm than I've seen in a while.

"Mommy! I am so glad you are home! You were out in the loud storm and I was so scared!"

Steve told me that she missed me a tad more than usual last night. He said she asked about me and what I was doing a few extra times. And she stalled bedtime with even more persistence. It turns out, she was truly worried! In Amelia's world, the family should be together in a thunderstorm. We should be inside our house, within arm's reach of one another, listening to the pounding hail against our windows and the cracks of thunder in the skies - together.

At first I brushed off her worry, telling her it wasn't a big deal. But I thought about it some more. And, really? I love that she was concerned for me. I love that family represents comfort. I love that our home is synonymous with safety. I love that togetherness is something she clings to, something that takes a prominent position in her world. I love that she could open up to me, explain that she was frightened and worried.

I absolutely love that I am her mommy.

I get worn down, frustrated, tired, and bored of the monotony life often brings. I wonder if my efforts are pointless. I feel like I give and give and give and do not always receive the same level of effort from others. I admit, sometimes I give into thoughts of what's the point?!?.

The point is, I am the biggest part of this child's world. I know I cannot promise I will be with her forever; we never truly know what tomorrow brings; but I will fight anything that comes my way -

Because a sweet, beautiful, brilliant little girl needs me.

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