I try to conjure memories of my most frightened moments, but they do not materialize. Sure, I have been afraid. I was stuck in an elevator once as a kid, thinking for a moment that no one would find me. Years later, at a football game, older kids (whom we did not know) tried to take me and my friend somewhere. We kicked and ran. Most recently, I have felt fear when a driving mistake led to a man following me, close to my bumper, for over 20 minutes.
But those fears seem silly today. Sure, they warrant a level of discomfort. And each time, I was truly afraid. But today, I know I cannot begin to imagine the fear of those in Aurora, just after midnight on opening night. I see darkness, hear chaos, the thunderclap sounds of gunfire - not from the speakers, but a few feet away. For real.
That is as far as I can imagine. There are many people in Colorado today who know more, who felt more. And many, unfortunately, who do not live to tell us of their experience.
If only it were just a movie. Or a bad dream.
We do not need to fill up our news with images of this mad man. We should instead celebrate the lives of the twelve who left our world. We should hope for the healing of their families and the others who were thrust into a deadly drama. My thoughts and prayers to the Aurora community and those who lost someone they love.